Lindsay Lohan: I Love Samantha Ronson 'Very Much'

By Paul Chi

Originally posted Monday November 10, 2008 03:00 PM EST on PEOPLE.COM

Lindsay Lohan may have experienced growing pains going in and out of rehab last year, but the newly grounded actress admits to regaining control of herself and being happy with her life.

"I'm a different person now," Lohan tells Harper's Bazaar for its December issue. "I'm happy."

The road to happiness has been a long one for Lohan. Before entering treatment centers at Cirque Lodge and Promises for DUI and possession of drugs, Lohan, 22, admits feeling lonely. "I was going to clubs all the time and it was not okay. I was so alone."

But she has taken responsibility for her downward spiral and ready to move forward. "I did it to myself and I have to deal with the consequences. I'm thankful for what I can take out of it. Now I feel clear," she says.

Not a Lesbian

Lohan says that her growing relationship with deejay Samantha Ronson is helping her stay grounded.

"She's a wonderful person and I love her very much," said Lohan.

The two have never publicly addressed the exact nature of their relationship, and the Mean Girls star resists labeling herself. Lohan said she is not a lesbian when asked point blank. When asked by Harper's Bazaar if she is bisexual, Lohan responded: "Maybe. Yeah."

"I feel like it jinxes it," she said, explaining why she is not talking about her love life. "It's hard. The second I start talking about whomever I'm seeing, a month or two later it's failed."

And will Lohan hear wedding bells in the future? "Eventually," she said. But whether that will be with a man or a woman, "I don't know."

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